What Can Be Done when Family Members Can’t Agree on Elder Care?

Elder Care in Pittsford, NY – The Elderly Loved One’s Needs Come Before Family Disagreements

Elder Care in Pittsford, NYLarry and his sister Emily used to get along when they were children. Larry was four years older than his sister and that had a significant factor on how well they got along. Now that they are adults, they have issues agreeing on just about anything, especially with regard to elder care for their mother.

It was Emily who first brought up the topic of home care for their elderly mother. Larry had a tendency to not visit or call very often, so he wasn’t too aware of the challenges that their mother was facing. Emily had moved closer to their mother in recent years in order to not only spend more time with her, but to also be there for her if she needed any help. From time to time their mother would call Emily and ask her to do certain things for her. She was more than happy to, but she began to notice that other issues were arising and she decided to talk to her mother about it first.

Her mother was against the concept of home care for the elderly at first. Once she realized that the pressure Emily was under to try to be there for her whenever she needed her, that’s when her mother warmed to the idea of professional elder care.

She encouraged Emily to talk to Larry about this so that they could work together and figure out what the best solution would be for her. Emily was reluctant, but she also understood that Larry had power of attorney for their mother. He was in charge of the finances and paying their mothers bills, since he was an accountant.

The more that they talked about elder care, the more they argued. It reached the point where Emily no longer want to talk to her older brother. This broken home scenario is not that uncommon, unfortunately.

What gets lost in the arguments is the fact that Larry and Emily’s mother was not getting the proper level of care she needed. Larry was angry that Emily hadn’t talked to him first before talking to their mother. Emily was upset that Larry was holding back hiring elder care out of some sense of wounded pride.

The animosity built and soon nothing was getting accomplished. Emily was still caring for her mother as best could, but it wasn’t nearly enough.

If you find that you can’t agree with a family member regarding elder care for a loved one, step back and realize who this care is for. It is not for you and it is not for the other person with whom you are arguing. It is for your elderly loved one. Even if the other person is not willing to back down, swallow your pride and do what is best for the elderly individual in your life.

If you have a loved one who could benefit from the help of elder care in Pittsford, NY contact the caregivers at Caring Hearts of Rochester, LLC. We help seniors and their families with many levels of home care service. Call (585) 245-0134 for more information.